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PBH100H: Understanding the Heart of a Vulnerable Women in a Crisis Pregnancy

No woman wants or desires to have an abortion. She feels often that she has no other choice.

“I am all alone.”

She feels that there is no one to support her
This is one of the most common fears
Those she trusts most have abandoned her
- You can't say this unless you mean it 100%, but it often just melts the fears: “I promise I will not abandon you.”
This is a time when she desires support the most

“I am so afraid.”

Fear is natural – realization that this is an immortal soul placed in her care
“You're trustworthy” or “you can do this” or “you might need help, but you can do this”
It's in the nature of man to protect and for women to nurture. Abortion emasculates men – encourage a man to protect his baby.
- When they said that to a man, his partner was in there the whole time waiting for him to come in a take her out

Fear

Perfect love casts out fear
No one is able to be totally self reliant. We are made in the image of God who is relational

Coaching example: employer finds out an employee asked for a Christmas bonus in advance to pay for an abortion

You have to understand what's going on, that she's scared and afraid
employer got her alone after work, let her know that she knew, and asked if there was anything she could do to help – the employee just shut down
Employer replied: “You must be so afraid” and she broke down and they embraced – the employer named what was going on in her heart

There is no room in the heart of the Father of the baby

She gave her whole self to him [missing]
The father rejects the mother when he rejects the baby
Women often are willing to suffer for another – unfortunately they will even suffer an abortion in order to “save” the relationship

There's no room in the heart of my parents for this baby

It is natural for parents to be surprised, even shocked
- it's natural and pretty healthy
- parents need a chance to mourn the ideals they had first – this pregnancy has put everyone into an emotional chaos
- she's wanting support and is telling people she loves, but they can't and they're incapable (except for the rare saint) to offer support immediately without first dealing with their own emotional chaos
Their daughter deserves better than abortion
- Sometimes, the Sisters can help the daughter by helping the mother. Often times, when parents are pressuring their children for abortion, it's because they think it's all going to fall on them.

My boyfriend told me that he would support be whatever I decide.

My mom had an abortion and she is fine.

Having suffered such a traumatic event a woman copes by repressing feelings for up to 20 years
“There is a difference between ignorance and denial.” – beINSPIRED

One day I want to be a mother and the next day I cannot even imagine it.

Unexpected pregnancy brings about unexpected joy
Normalize this feeling: it is very natural, especially for new parents, even in non-crisis pregnancy situations

Do not give way to fear